Well, I think it is.
Actually I have no idea if it is, or if I’m just pretending it is to give me purpose and drive to get through this tricky project/film/industry/life.
I was raised in a Christian Conference Centre called Letton Hall out in the sticks of Norfolk. My Father left a lucrative career running his own company to buy a large sprawling, but rather dilapidated country house. His plan was to open it up to schools, churches and groups of people wanting a country getaway, which offered a Christian sanctuary. I would like you to immediately disregard the images of country getaways that consist of spas, down duvets, expensive candles and 5* food and instead replace them with dormitory rooms, creaky pipes, itchy woollen blankets and home cooked food for the masses. Letton Hall was by no means glamorous, polished or even that warm, but the essence of the place came from my Dad, vision and calling, and as a result, it effervesced with joyfulness, fun, acceptance, welcome and love. The aesthetics, although sometimes ropey aaaaand maybe occasionally hazardous, were irrelevant and secondary to the way the place made people feel.
I remember waiting quite patiently for my life’s calling from a young age. I didn’t always follow the path of Christianity as much of my family did, I fell in and out of love with religion and remain to this day somewhat confused, but at least now, very content with my own beliefs and relationship with religion (not a topic for today.) I also love swearing, which is frowned upon somewhat. But I wanted a calling in life that would put me on a path so definite that I’d have to do very little thinking about the what and more about the how. I tried to get passionate about things; ballet, the flute, lacrosse, football, art, absolutely nothing academic. And they were all ok, but nothing set my heart blazing.
I ended up falling into a Multi Media HND course at City College Norwich in 2004 and met this entirely awkward and somewhat difficult individual called Richard. I was still fumbling my way through life, my only real joy was socialising and spending time with family and friends - a sure-fire way to pay the bills, ha! But this Richard guy was like my Dad. He wanted to make films. Snowboard films back then. I had literally no idea what snowboarding was and tried to ignore him as much as possible.
20 years later, that awkward individual is my husband, and he has followed his vision, and I believe his calling, without deviating at all. I often voice my envy at him having something he is so driven and passionate about doing, just like my Father. God forbid you get in their way or suggest something that is outside the blinkered path of their journey. These types of people are infuriatingly stubborn, determined, sometimes selfish and driven 100% by passion. My Father did not run Letton as a means to get rich, in fact it was quite the opposite. As a crumbling house and a registered charity, cash was scarce. “We are rich in bricks, mortar and love” he would say. “Well, I’d like some Nike trainers, a walkman and Pop Tarts, so that’s not helpful” I would scream in my head as an angry, and pretty vile, 16 year old. The path of filmmaking is not too different. There are moments of great richness in creativity and community, but let’s face it, unless you are backed by a studio, no-ones cashing in a great deal here.
I think if you have a true calling in life, a natural skill or talent for something, I do believe this can be a hindrance, as much, if not more, than a gift. I see frequently how lost people can become when their talent or gift becomes redundant, usually financially. The last few years have seen many creatives, called to a life in advertising, branding, film or TV, feel utterly useless as work dries up and they have nowhere to funnel their talent and energy. Suddenly lacking purpose. But do they leave? Do they immediately jump ship when it’s hard and move on to something else? Very rarely. These people called to run our creative and entertainment industries stay until the very last feasible point. They would rather sell their houses, rinse their savings and move in with parents, than leave the industry they feel called to work in. So it’s incredibly important to have these stubborn and determined people, otherwise any industry that’s hard, would simply fall apart.
I now take our youngest daughter to church on Sundays (most anyways, no judgement please!). She is 8 and has very much decided she is a Christian. The elder daughter, 12, and Rich are not compelled to join, but do love a good debate on all things religion. You can imagine how fun this is, I’m sure. I very happily partake. I sit next to my 86 year old Dad, sing at the top of my lungs, mingle with lovely people and come home always feeing uplifted. Be you religious or not, most churches, are filled with wonderful warm community people - and lots of free tea and biscuits. Go or don’t go, I have no preference. But this passed Sunday, we all went. My sister returned home from missionary work in Mexico and we all headed to church to welcome her back. The talk was all about callings and it once again got me thinking back to this subject and I left feeling like I’d still not got mine. And I’ve just turned 40. Where is it? Then I read this:
It’s about discovering your unique purpose in life and using your gifts and talents to make a difference in the world.
Oh. It’s as simple as that? Not a lightbulb moment or some great earthquake movement of enlightenment? Just, do what you’re good at and do it with purpose.
It’s interesting to ask those around you what they think your calling is. Usually it’s so obvious to others, but we cannot see it ourselves. Mine, I have learnt, is people. I bloody love people. The weird and the wonderful. The old and the young. People energise me and infuriate me. The growing network of people I have around me enables me to do my job, pulling talented people together on a film set with a united aim to get great films and content to fruition.
Ask the person next to you, unless you’re in a pub and you don’t know them from Adam, and see what they say. If they say something you don’t like, keep asking until you get an answer you do like, and go with that. After all, it’s your calling, you choose!
Let us know what your calling is in the comments below!
Ar thus time if my life oeace, happiness and never stopping!